Image by jgiehl2001 via Flickr

Recently I was discussing roles within a marriage with my wife and the word picture for an Indie Car Race Team came up as a good example. To win you need a good team, a pit crew (God, Jesus & Angels) in your corner, a lead car (husband) and a back up car (wife) who has your back. The metaphor of a Husband as the lead car and wife as the back up car really seems to be a strong metaphor. A back up car blocks other cars and makes sure lead car gets more point over the season. The back up cars goal isn’t to win but to make sure the lead car wins and that no one can get a clear lead on lead car. One team can’t have two leads. There must be one point leader. The cars have headsets for communication, which is essential. There is a lookout or spotter who sits up high to give a good overview of the race, your place and what you need to do, much like the Holy Spirit. And you need a lookout which Jesus does for us interceding on our behalf. In a marriage understanding the lead cat and support car roles are important. Marriage isn’t a race where you want sponsors, or get into it for wrong reasons such as money or gold digging.

For women, a marriage shouldn’t be run like a horse bet where you have a vested interest in the outcome in such a way that you seek to control the outcome or cheat to win. This can apply to men as well when they step out of Gods will. Don’t bet on the race, let the best horse (man) win. Don’t try to cheat or force (coherse) your husbands hand. It’s good to be a good advisor and to give good advice. Try not to repeat yourself forcefully. Let the man pray and process. Allow the man to decide. Allow the man to make mistakes. If you do these things you will find less friction and more cohesion in your marriage. Be the proverbs 31 woman. Make sure the home is squared away so the man can lead and make decisions. Support your man, Love your man, Encourage your man, Build your man up and Help your man feel respected and you will find G-d blesses your house with more provision and abundance.

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